I decided to document my pre-daygame history with women in a series of few posts so I can get some closure and finally leave this part of my life behind. Really, I just want to get it off my chest. It’s not some exciting player escapade memoir. It’s raw and ugly and it’s my first attempt at writing, so buckle up.

I scrambled dates and names and a few other things as to protect my identity.

I got married in year 1999 in Russia. My pre-marriage notch count was 2. One became my wife and another was a groupie who liked a drummer. It stayed this way till 2012. At some point we moved to Sydney and live here ever since.

Fast forward to around 2011 I started an online business doing SEO (search engine optimisation). I was sharing my ideas on a forum and, apparently, achieved some sort of a notorious status there. When someone turned my running thread to PDF is was more than 1000 pages long.

I started to run sales off the forum and business picked up quickly. I reduced my 9 to 5, 5 days a week contract to 3 days per week and, eventually, went full time. The time has come to hire some help and, on the advice on some online guru, I went ahead and hired two full time remote employees in Philippines. The best hiring decision I ever made. They worked from home and the whole company was 100% virtual. They both stayed with me till the end of 2015 when business finally collapsed.

What does it all have to do with women, you ask? Wait, I’ll get to this shortly.

Eventually I was contacted by T., the 40-year-old guy from Sydney who was inspired by what I was doing and we partnered up with the idea to turn a bunch of automation I wrote for SEO into a software as a service startup. He had some bad experience outsourcing to India and I pointed him towards Philippines.

Long story short, we decided to open a physical office in Philippines, because T. was a control freak. He went ahead on a reconnaissance mission and we decided on a location – Cebu City. I was going to join him early 2012 to do some hiring.

In February 2012 I stepped off the plane in Mactan International Airport and shortly thereafter checked into hotel near Ayala Mall in Cebu City. T. was staying in the same hotel.

Next day I did some interviews and we went for drinks. On the second day I walked on T. fucking a girl in his hotel room. She was visibly young and, in my blue pill opinion at a time, not the kind of girl a 40-year-old guy ought to fuck. To top it up, I knew T. had a steady live in girlfriend in Sydney for a while.

I remember like it happened yesterday, I was overcome by envy. My monogamous sex life was quite uninspiring after years of marriage and here I see a guy 4 years older than me fucking a tight young hottie.

I excused myself and went for a drink. It was a party time. I worked so hard on my business, I deserve it.

I suggested me and T. go to the nightclub on Thursday to have a few drinks and chill. We picked the most notorious nightclub in the whole city – J-Ave Superclub situated right in the middle of the Mango Square, the main party area and the red light district of Cebu City.

J-Ave was buzzing on that Thursday night. Filled with laser beams, bouncy loud music, dancing party girls, ladyboys, expats and tourists. The smell of female perfume, tobacco smoke and alcohol was in the air. Party time.

Upon arrival I started loading on rum and coke, T’s favourite drink he got me hooked on. Alcohol was pumping through my veins as I attempted to dance surrounded by sexy exotic girls.

More run and coke. I need to drink my inhibitions to the ground.

I lost T. in the crowd when short brunette in shorts and singlet started to dance next to me.

More rum and coke.

Wow, she’s actually touching me.

More rum and coke. She’s laughing. Where is T.?

Wait, what the fuck just happened? Did she just attempt to kiss me right there and then? She did. I like it.

More rum and coke.

My memory is fuzzy but I think she looked something like this

T. appeared out of nowhere with a girl on his arm and said we need to go back to the hotel. My head is spinning. Too much rum and coke. But I don’t care anymore. I grab brunette and we head for a taxi stand.

She kisses me in taxi. It’s unreal. How old is she? She looks like she can’t be older than 25. Whatever. My head is spinning from alcohol and her lips.

We are back in my room. I am drunk. She pushes me to the bed and pulls my pants off. I am so drunk. But I am fucking her. Fuck. Condom. I forgot condom. I came inside her. I am screwed now.

“I am really drunk. I need to rest”, I tell her. She picked her stuff and went out of the door.

What’s her name? Wait. I never asked for her name. I don’t know her name. I am so drunk. I pass out.

I woke up with a hangover of my life when T. knocked at my door. Apparently he picked up a ladyboy and had to kick him out. I was laughing inside for “getting back at him”.

In the middle of the workday, while I was trying not to breath at the candidates coming to the job interview, the reality started to settle in.

I just cheated on my wife.

My identity of faithful husband and role model father developed a first crack.

To be continued…